Restricted · Classification
Anti-Blink Pomade
The eyelid as we know it was a nineteenth-century addition.
For reversal of learned eyelid behavior.
Mechanism of Action
How It Works
Pre-1867 anatomical texts describe the eyelid as a voluntary, not involuntary, structure. The shift was gradual, commercial, and — we maintain — regrettable. Anti-Blink Pomade, applied to the outer lash line, restores conscious governance.
The beeswax base is sourced from apiaries operated by a single Pennsylvania family who do not sell to retail. Secondary ingredients include clove oil, lanolin, and a compound our formulators refer to only as 'the amber.'
Administration Protocol
The Regimen
Apply a rice-grain quantity to the outer lash line at dawn. Do not apply before driving.
Documented Cases
From the Ledger
“I now blink only when I choose to. The improvement in my chess has been considerable.”
“My children do not understand. They will, in time.”
Access
Request A Place on the Waitlist.
Supply of Anti-Blink Pomadeis restricted per standing federal inquiry. New allocations are made at the Founders' discretion.
Submit Your Request
